Learn to Express Some Emotion
A lot of the guys are amazed at how interesting they become as soon as they learn to express some genuine emotion. For example: I was recently eating dinner on a Saturday night with a friend, chatting about the progress he made the night before and getting him revved up to hit the town with confidence. I asked him, “Okay, imagine that there are two girls sitting here with us right now…what could you make conversation about?” After a few minutes of frowning and scratching his head, he suggested that he could talk about:
- The food.
- The restaurant we were in.
“Awesome!” I said. I followed up by asking him, “Okay…talk about those things as if the girls were sitting here with us now.” After another two minutes of frowning and head-scratching, he replied, “Hmm……………….the food is nice…….and….ah, this is a nice restaurant…?” I pretended to fall asleep on the table. “Dude…that is so boring!” Okay, enough of the reenactments… Here’s what he should have done instead:
Used his emotional perspective to talk about the food and the restaurant
“I tell you what…this food is awesome…I love Japanese food……especially how it’s so close to being natural y’know…hardly any additives and stuff…” Notice how I am revealing my emotions and showing that it’s okay to share your feelings about food around me. Compare that to the approach that my client was previously using. His conversational style had always meant that women would barely even respond to him. Why? Because people can tell that you’re lying (or too afraid to voice your real opinion) when you say that everything is nice, nice, nice.
Gotten the women involved
After saying the statement about the food, he could have then added a question on the end to get the women involved. “How about you guys – what are some of your favorite foods?” Notice how I’m directing the conversation toward positive feeling emotions and I’m including the words ‘some of’ to indicate that I want more than one answer.
